Counter Strike: Global Offensive Review

Counter Strike: Global Offensive: Is it better or worse than Source?

Taking GO as a whole, not so much has changed. The first thing you notice as the game loads up is a more modern looking menu, strikingly similar to other games currently out (makes me feel like the team behind GO are trying to make a Call of Counter Strike). They also seem to guide you towards the new match making system, by subtly hiding the browse server behind the play game screen. The match making is ok I guess, but browsing servers is still the best way to go, especially for clan gaming and modded servers. Though, as of this date, the Classic Competitive match maker mode is utterly terrible - like communism, it means well but is just carried out atrociously. You have to wait what seems a fucking millennium for it to match you with nine other players, before you all have to click ready to start the match – then of course, one joker doesn’t press it. Another ten minutes of waiting (yes, I’ve waited that long), you finally get put into a game, with what always seems to be angry American teens, primary school dropout people with no sense of up or down,  or ‘hard-core’ gamers who hate anyone who isn’t marginally brilliant. Classic Competitive is a 5 A side, basic game of CS, lasting 30 rounds. And god help you if you leave, you’ll get a five minute ban from match making, which increases exponentially every other time you leave (I totalled up a whole weeks ban, which wasn’t fun).

THE most annoying thing about Classic Competitive though, is whilst you’re playing and someone else leaves. A vote menu then appears saying “A player has left, continue with bots?” So basically, that one person who has left will be replaced with a Bot, if EVERYONE on the server votes yes. And, like the clicking accepts, one ass will always click no. The server immediately folds and you’re back on the main menu. A big waste of time, no? I do like the competitive 5 a side gameplay, it really does require you to think and play as a team, but the whole malarkey with leaving and how long it takes to find a bleeding game is just too much hassle.   The other three modes match making are Arms Race (gun game), Demolition (basically gun game), and Classic Casual (just a normal server, literally). They do the job well, but it just seems a lot easier to browse the server list and favourite a good server. Then of course, if you play the same server a lot, you make friends on the server (which is great if you got no friends).

The actual gameplay hasn’t seemed to change too much. When you first join a server, you see how brilliant the graphics are compared to Source, and also how much quicker the ducking and jumping movement are. The Buy Menu is now this pie chart wheel thing, which took me for ever to get used to. It’s meant to be simpler, but I don’t get how. If the up to down list is too complicated, a fucking wheel with the categories for each gun spinning round, with each category having its own wheel of guns isn’t going to be much easier. They’ve also removed the option to pre save four weapon sets in the Buy Menu, which used to save lots of time – especially on servers which have no time to buy weapons. You’ll also notice as you play the game more, that the money earned isn’t in stupid amounts anymore – instead of having $2364 in your balance, you’ll just have $2300.

The addition of new guns is one way Valve has tried to extend the game a bit more. The Mag – 7 and Sawed Off Shotgun are two incredibly powerful and quick shotguns (believe it or not), which literally destroy everything within a short range. But like all shotguns on this game, if you’re far away enough that you can’t feel the breath of the opponent wafting over your pasty skin, these guns do no damage at all.

The PP-Bizon submachine gun isn’t half bad to be honest. It makes up for a less than impressive firepower with its huge 64 bullet clip, and half decent accuracy.

 Another new heavy weapon is the Negev machine gun, which in good hands is stupidly powerful. It has a 150 bullet clip and a fire rate so quick Usian Bolt would die of fear. It’s accuracy and recoil though is so absolutely awful, but can be easily tamed by bursting the shots.

The only new pistol (as if they needed anymore) is the Tec-9 (Terrorist team only). It’s got an accuracy, firepower, and fire rate to match the shitty BB pistol under my bed. I’d like to say it makes up for a lack of everything with its 32 clip round, but it doesn’t. It’s like trying to make a kids bumble bee rollercoaster more fun by making it go around twice – it’s still a pile of shit. There’s no point wasting $400 on this, just buy a couple of grenades instead, and stick with the glock.

The final new gun is the Zues, found in the gear section of the menu. It’s a high powered tazor pistol with one shot, costing $1000, with normally one hit kill damage. ‘Sounds good’ I heard people say, but it’s not. It’s crap. I can piss further than this gun’s range is, and if you’re not in range, it doesn’t do any damage at all – literally! For $1000 you could by a whole set of armour or a decent pistol. Just avoid it completely.

CS:GO, seem to have its tongue hovering quite close to Call Of Duty’s arsehole, with the introduction now of the Decoy Grenade. It’s not too bad, popping up on your map as an enemy frantically shooting away. But that’s just it – who on this game stands still shooting there gun into a wall like a maniac – it’s obvious on smaller maps what is a decoy and what isn’t. The only other new grenade is the Molotov (terrorist) or Incendiary (counter terrorist). Costing one of your testicles to buy ($850 for one!) they explode with fire covering a decent area, leaving flames on the floor for about ten seconds. I love these grenades, if I can afford one I’ll always get one. They’re brilliant at pushing the enemy back, as if caught in the flame it slows you down as well as in flicking about 8-12 damage per second – wounds that need licking!

The one problem I have with CS:GO , is the removal of Silencers. Yes, that’s right, they’ve gotten rid of the silencers from all that could have one! I still to this day don’t know why they removed it. The whole idea of the game is to be tactful and sneaky, but that’s just not possible running in screaming with loud guns blasting. If anyone from Valve ever reads this (a big hope I know, we can all dream), BRING IT BACK. Give us an update and write them back into the game.

As for the game itself, massive thumbs up! The new graphics are a lot more pleasant to play with, and killing the opponent seems even more satisfying. In my eyes, Source was the penultimate, the classic. But I think Valve have pulled it off with Global Offensive. It’s a great game, with mostly great gamers playing it. And for £11.99, a bargain! Who in their right mind after playing this would then pay £44.99 for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 129.

Peace. 

Written by Josh

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